Thinking of You
by xoxocb
Summary: Starts from the epic train station scene in episode 4.02 Double Identity. Chuck moves on to Eva. Blair moves on to Louis.
1. The Truth About the Lies

**AN: This is my first fan fiction and I am really excited. Like most of you, I am a Chair fan. This is short because it is just introducing ****my story. It starts from the epic train station scene in episode 4.02 Double Identity. Please review and leave criticism and suggestions. Hope you enjoy!**

**Thinking of You**

The Truth About the Lies

_Chapter 1_

Chuck froze when he saw her. He immediately began to have flashbacks of the last time they spoke. _"Blair, I thought you didn't love me anymore or cared if I lived or died. Jenny Humphrey was-" "Don't say her name! Or anything else to me ever again. This whole night didn't happen." _He remembers everything he keeps trying to forget. Jack Bass. The Empire. Jenny Humphrey. All the mistakes Chuck Bass had made that Henry Prince would never repeat. He can't help but think how gorgeous Blair is as she searches the crowd. Blair's red, rosette ruffle, strapless gown looked beautiful against her pale skin and dark hair. Her red lips irresistible. He misses her so much but he knows he lost her. He just stares at her unable to move.

She sees him and hardly recognizes him. No suit in sight. Just a pale blue button-up shirt tucked in cheap pants. Then she sees his cane. Her heart drops. Suddenly, their eyes meet and gravity slowly makes them come face-to-face. She searches into his dark, lost eyes, hurting because she can't see the man she once loved.

Blair breaks the silence. "Just because you're dressed poorly doesn't mean you're not Chuck Bass." She tries to smile.

"Why would I want to be him?" Chuck replies smiling back, weakly. Blair can see right through him and he knew it.

"You should have told me you got shot."

"I'm surprised you didn't shoot me yourself..." He sometimes wished she had.

"I have. Many times... In my dreams... The good ones. But if you were really hurt I would wanna know," she insists.

"When I woke up my ID was gone. Nobody knew who I was; nobody was coming to look for me... I realized 'I might me alive, but Chuck Bass doesn't have to be,'" he explains.

"Changing your name doesn't change who you are..."

"It's a good start. A chance lo live simply, earn people's respect...maybe become a person someone could love." It hurt to actually say it out loud. He knew once it left his mouth Blair would try to put some sense into him.

"Someone did love you..." Blair looks down so he doesn't see the affect he still has on her. Then she quickly looks back into his eyes. "and... you owe it to her. And everyone else you're leaving behind not to run away, which is what you're doing. And I don't think that great man you're talking about wanting to be...is a coward. I think he would face up to what he did."

Chuck looked straight into her eyes and said the only thing he believed would help her understand his actions. "I_ destroyed_ the only thing I ever loved."

Blair felt herself starting to choke up. She had to stay strong. She spent all summer trying to forget him. She met Prince Louis and nobody could be a better distraction for her. She was truly starting to become happy again. She pulled out the ring he was going to purpose to her with. She slowly handed it back to him. She knew this was the time to end all things with Chuck. She let out a big sigh and she knows that she will never see any other ring as perfect as the one had chosen for her. She looked him right in the eyes and said the five hardest words she ever had to say in her life. "I don't love you anymore."

She never saw Chuck looked more broken then she did right after she said those words. She couldn't give into him, though. She replied to his reaction the only way she could. "But it takes more than even you to destroy Blair Waldorf," she smiles.

Chuck had no idea how to respond to that. He just says the obvious. "Your world would be easier if I didn't come back..."

She knew he was right. But she couldn't risk never seeing him again. "That's true...But it wouldn't be my world without you in it."

They just kept looking into each other's eyes. He couldn't believe it was really over. There was nothing more they could say or do. Blair kisses his cheek and leaves. A few moments later, he grabs his bags and goes to find Eva.

* * *

"I knew it was too good to be true. Who is she?" she says to Serena.

Serena only met Eva earlier that day. She wasn't too sure what her relationship is with Chuck and whether or not to explain Blair to her. It was a touchy topic and she didn't want to make anything more complicated. "I don't think I am in any position to tell you. You will have to ask Chuck yourself. I'm sorry."

"Chuck? Can you at least explain that to me? Everybody keeps saying he is Chuck when he told me his name is Henry Prince." Eva has never felt more confused then she did right then.

"Well, it will take a while to explain. I don't have much time." Serena is really trying to avoid the topic and just get away.

"Please, just the basics! Something to make me understand anything..." she pleads.

"Alright, let's go to the café across the street," _I can't believe I'm doing this!_ She says to herself.

They cross the street and sit down on the bench outside the café. Serena takes a deep breath and carefully chooses what information to give to Eva. "I don't know where to begin."

"Begin anywhere. Honestly!"

Serena can see she is really desperate for any information. She decides to just explain who Chuck really is and what Blair was to him. "His name is Chuck Bass. Not Henry Prince. He is trying to change his identity because he can't deal with the problems he created for himself." Eva just stares at her with a confused look. Serena continues, "He is one of the richest men in the upper east side. In his past he would hook up with every girl in Manhattan, drink and do drugs. Blair was his closest friend and one day they hooked up when they were both vulnerable-"

"That beautiful brunette woman who was just with you," Eva said cutting her off.

Serena nodded. She looked at Eva to make sure it was okay to continue. Eva nodded. "It took him a long time to confess he loved her. He never had a relationship and never let anybody get close to him. His dad passed and left him Bass Industries, and ever since he has been trying to prove that he can handle the responsibility. It came to the point where he would even trade his girlfriend, his only love, to get a hotel back. It ruined them. Finally, he did the most romantic thing he could think of to win Blair back and that was to copy one of her favorite movies, _An Affair to Remember_. He stood on top of the Empire State building with her favorite flowers, peonies. He waited and waited, but she never came because her maid, Dorota, went into labor that morning. Chuck was really heart broken. He then slept with Blair's worse enemy who is also my step-sister, even_ his_ step-sister, Jenny Humphrey. When Blair finally got to him, the damage was done. She found out right when Chuck was about to purpose. She told him not to speak to her ever again and hasn't seen him since 'til now. And all that is honestly just the basics of him. There is so much more..."

"I would have never guessed… I…" Eva was speechless. She didn't know what to think of it all. The man she met was so sweet and caring. He could never hurt a fly. It was definitely a lot to take in.

"I know. I'm sorry. I don't know where you stand with him and I am pretty sure I said too much-"

"No. Thank you. I really needed to know. I just don't know what to do from here."

Blair just turned the corner and looked for Serena by the car. Then she spotted her. She motioned for Serena to cross the street so they can leave. Tears were running down her face.

"Well it looks like you will find out soon. I'm sorry, but-"

"It's fine. You can go. Don't let me keep you. Hen- I mean, _Chuck_ should be coming any moment now." It felt weird to say his real name.

Serena nodded and went over to Blair.

* * *

Serena and Blair quickly got in the car. Blair asked the driver to give her a minute and just stay parked.

"What happened, B?" Serena asked. She was really worried.

"Nothing. I said all I had to say. I just never thought I would feel like this afterwards. It's over between Chuck and I. For good! I don't think I can handle it. What if I made the worst mistake I could ever make? What if-"

Blair was talking really fast and freaking out. "Stop it, B. You know how many mistakes Chuck has made? Too many to count! You did the right thing. I know it's hard but you will get through it. I will be here for you. You will get over him soon enough. And you will with Louis. An actual prince! You can't get a better rebound than that."

Blair leaned on Serena's shoulder and let out a big sigh. She laughed a little. "You're right, S. I deserve to move on and be happy. I deserve a_ real_ prince."

"You do, B. How about you clean up your make-up attend that ball? Louis is waiting for you. And I have a date with his sexy driver." Serena winked at Blair.

"That is a good idea. But I can't tell if you are trying to cheer me up or get rid of me," Blair smiled.

"Both, actually…" Serena laughed.

"Wow, S. Thanks a lot! I guess we should be going. Driver? To the ball! This Cinderella has no time to waste."

"Oui, Mademoiselle."

Blair knew that she did the right thing and she cannot wait to see her true prince.

* * *

Chuck finally started slowly walking back towards Eva. It took him a while, but he finally found her sitting outside the café.

"Eva! You ready?" Chuck yelled across the street. She just looked up at him and then looked back down. _Shit_, Chuck said to himself. He doesn't want to lose Eva as well. He quickly limps across the street to see what's wrong. He sits down next to her and lifts her chin up.

"Don't…" she says and turns her head away. She didn't know what to say to him. All she knows is that she is hurt and she feels like their whole relationship was a lie.

"What happened?" he asked, dreading the answer. He knows she knows. Now all he can do is wait for her to bring it up. He stares at the cars driving past and all the happy couples walking around in the most romantic city in the world. He wonders why his life can't be that simple.

"I know everything, _Chuck_." She felt wrong saying his name, but she had to. It was the only way she can prove that she knows.

"Who told you?" he asked. He knew the answer. He can't believe he couldn't hide his identity for long. Everything was just falling apart all around him.

"Serena. The girl you said you didn't know earlier. The one that came by earlier today..." She says trying to explain who she is.

"I know. She is my step-sister. I'm sorry you had to find out everything like this." He truly was. He really did like Eva. Everything was simple with her. What you see is what you get. If only he could be the same.

"So what happens now? You leave me? We go our separate ways? I can go-"

"Eva, no... Listen to me." He grabs her hand. She still wouldn't look at him. "All the time we spent together was real. That wasn't a lie. I just felt that if you knew the truth, you wouldn't take a second look at me. I'm a mess!" he truly meant what he said. Eva was good for him.

"Really?" she smiled looking back up at him.

"Really. I would never hurt you. You are all I care about now." He was determined not to destroy her as well.

"Well did you get the tickets? Do we have money left over for food?"

"I thought you said you knew everything. I'm Chuck Bass." He smirked. "Money isn't a problem." He smiles and kisses her passionately on her soft lips. She kisses him back and hugs him tight.

"Oh yeah. This is going to take some getting use to, Mr. Bass," she replies with a smile and kisses his neck. She can't believe her life has turned around so fast. She met the most handsome, sweetest man and now he has money as well. She is truly living a fairytale.


	2. New Starts

**AN: Serena has received the information she told Eva from Blair at one time or another. I didn't have her say anything she didn't know. I enjoyed your reviews and so happy you all want Chair together! I do as well and they will be in this FF to answer most of your questions. I will update again soon but i would like to get up to 30 reviews. :D**

**Thinking of You**

New Starts

_Chapter 2_

It was already eight and the event started at six. Blair didn't want to look bad by coming late, but she didn't want the prince to look like he got stood up, either. _I can just tell him I got food poisoning_, she thought. The car was already parked at the entrance and nobody was even outside anymore to greet her. Blair was just sitting in the back seat of the car and messing with the ruffles in her dress, not even bothering to look at Serena as she spoke. "I change my mind. I don't want to go to the ball," announced Blair.

"B… You have to go in. Louis is waiting for you! You can't let Chuck hold you back, anymore. You deserve to be happy, remember?" Serena was really getting annoyed by Blair. All she did this summer was go to the museum and stare at the same painting or read books that she has already read before. Blair needed to get back out there. She needed new experiences, like becoming real royalty. She wasn't called Queen B for nothing.

"Chuck has nothing to do with this. I just don't feel like going. Besides, I'm already late. I don't want to give a bad impression. " Everything she said was true. She really didn't see why she can't just go to the next ball.

"Blair Cornelia Waldorf! You are going into that ball and you are going to have a good time! You are not going to mope around like you have all summer. I am sick of it. Louis is waiting for you and he isn't going to for much longer. You know how many girls would love to be with a prince? Get out of the car, B. Get out! I have a date to get to." Serena opened the door and stared down Blair. Blair's mouth dropped open, stunned. "Come on. I don't have all night."

Blair didn't understand where Serena's random outburst came from. She knew she was right, though. If she didn't get to Louis, someone else will. She sighed reluctantly.

"Fine… But I'm going because I want to,_ not_ because you made me," Blair insisted.

"Okay, whatever you say, B." Serena just watched Blair check her make-up more time and slowly get out of the car. Serena laughed at Blair's pouting face and then closed the door. "Driver, La Rotonde, please."

"Oui, Mademoiselle," said the driver as he started going back onto the road.

"If I don't have a good time I will make sure you won't either for the rest of our stay in Paris!" she shouted at Serena as the car started driving away. She was sick to her stomach. She didn't know what to expect or where to go. Blair turned around and slowly walked up to entrance.

Two handsome doormen opened the door and said, "Bonsoir, Mademoiselle!"

"Bonsoir…" she replied weakly, not knowing what she has gotten herself into.

* * *

"So where do you want to go for dinner?" Chuck asked Eva resting his chin on her soft blonde waves.

"It doesn't matter. I want whatever you want." She replied vaguely. She sat up and looked in his chocolate eyes.

"Come on, Eva. Pick _any_ place you want. We can afford it," he kept insisting.

"How? All we have is the money left from your trust fund…" Eva remembered he was now Chuck Bass and there was probably more where that money came from. "That isn't where the money was from, was it?"

"Well… sort of… The point is that I now have money and we can go and live however we please." Chuck was really trying to have fresh start and have the best life he can with Eva. The problem is that she keeps trying to find out more and more about him. All he wants to do is forget and move on.

"Is that what you and Blair did? Go off to Milan for dinner, live in the fanciest house, and buy all the things you wanted?" Eva didn't want to be compared to Blair. She wanted a different kind of relationship and not one that will constantly remind him of his first love.

Chuck didn't know how Eva wanted him to respond. Of course he didn't do all those things. As much as he wished he could have with Blair, he was too busy with The Empire. That was the biggest problem in his relationship with Blair. He was sure not to do that to Eva. "I know it seems like that's the way I use to live, but it wasn't. I was always busy with business deals and opening hotels. I never had a lot of time for Blair. It was always work this and work that. But now I am done with The Empire. I'm done with everything. All I want to focus on is you." He was hoping she would start to believe him.

"So you are done with Chuck Bass?" Eva knew that she couldn't deal with Chuck. She wasn't strong enough for him. She needed to stay with Henry a little while longer.

"I'm done. How about we go make it official? Tomorrow morning I will change my identity and make Henry Prince my new name. Then I can have a brand new start with you." Chuck couldn't believe he just said that. It was necessary, though. It was the only way he can cope without Blair. He needed a new life. A new distraction.

"Are you sure? That's a bit extreme. You don't have to." Eva couldn't believe he would do that. She also couldn't believe that secretly, that is what she really wanted. She wanted to be sure he was done with his past.

"Positive. This will be my last night as Chuck Bass and in celebration I will make one more splurge." Chuck kissed her forehead and took her hand. "Come on. I know one of the best restaurants in Paris."

* * *

"Serena, you look absolutely stunning," said Pierre, the handsome driver, as he held open the door for her.

"You don't look too bad yourself," Serena winked as she walked into the restaurant. This was Serena's second date with him, but this time she knew who he really was. She's surprised she actually agreed to this dinner because this whole trip consisted of sleeping with every hot French guy she could. This was different. She was taking the time to get to know him. Something she didn't do often.

"Avez-vous une réserve?" asked the hostess.

"Oui. Il convient de Pierre Dubois, parti pour deux," he replied confidently.

"Dubois… Dubois ... Dubois ... Ah! Ici vous êtes. Droit de cette façon." The hostess directed them towards their table. She had light brown hair and green eyes. She was gorgeous. Serena thought she could even pass for Nate's long lost sister. Finally Pierre pulled out Serena's chair and she then took a seat.

"Thank you. You are a real gentleman, Pierre." Serena liked that. Most guys in Paris just worried about getting in her pants, which wasn't even that hard to do.

"Well, I assume every guy treats you this way. You are a rare beauty."

"You are so sweet. Pierre, can you do me a favor?"

"Anything."

"Can you translate for me? My French isn't exactly the best. I just know key phrases." Serena had never really paid any attention in French class.

"I'd be honored to," chuckled Pierre.

"Bonjour, mon nom est Marcus et je serai votre garçon, ce soir," said the waiter to Serena. She looked at Pierre confused.

"He said his name is Marcus. He is our waiter," he laughed.

"I knew that," replied Serena sarcastically.

"Nous aimerions avoir un verre de votre meilleur vin, s'il vous plaît," ordered Pierre.

"Tout de suite, monsieur," the waiter replied.

"I just ordered us some wine while we look at the menu," explained Pierre.

"What is Entrecôte de bœuf à la fleur de sel?" asked Serena.

"A sirloin steak basically," answered Pierre.

"Mmm… I'll have that."

"I will, too," smiled Pierre.

The waiter came back and took their order and poured their wine.

"Tell me about yourself, Serena. I did all the talking last time."

"There isn't much to say." Serena didn't have anything to say about herself that didn't include boy drama or daddy issues.

"There must be something. No? How about I teach you some French, then?"

"Sure. Teach me, oh wise one," Serena said jokingly. She was happy the subject changed.

"Okay, um… Say, 'Voulez-vous m'embrasser.'"

"Voulez-vous m'embrasser"

Pierre reached across the table and kissed her softly on her lips and then sat back down laughing.

"What was that for?" Serena asked confused while smiling like an idiot.

"You asked, 'Will you kiss me?'"

"Oh…" Serena blushed. That was one of the most romantic things anyone has ever done. She truly was starting to like him. That is the last thing she needs right now. She is already trying to choose between Nate and Dan. Serena took a sip of her wine.

"Was I too forward?" Pierre asked concerned.

"No, not at all. It was cute."

"Good. The last thing I want is to scare you away."

Chuck and Eva walked into the restaurant and Serena spotted them right away. She felt like she should talk to Chuck and see where his head is at. He can't continue his games anymore. Luckily, Pierre's back was facing the entrance and restroom. He won't even notice what she's about to do.

"Pierre, I need to go to the ladies room. Will you excuse me?" Serena said as she got up.

"Of course. Hurry back!" he called after her.

* * *

The ballroom was beautiful. It was so classy looking and definitely Blair's scene. She was at the top of the staircase and taking everything in. There were shades of pearls and champagne everywhere she looked. Her magenta heels contrasted well with the grey glossed floor.

She scanned the room looking for Louis and then she saw him. He looked so handsome and royal in his navy blue uniform. She then caught his eye. He just stared at her with a gaped mouth. She smiled. She knew she looked stunning and she got the reaction she was hoping for. Soon the whole room went silent and everyone stared at her. She then started walking down the steps a bit embarrassed. She was late after all, but she did live for a big entrance. She then heard whispers going about. Nothing that's new to her.

"Who is she?"

"I don't know, but she's beautiful."

"I think she is a princess from another country."

"No, I would know if she was. I know all royal families."

Blair just kept her head high and got a rush from all this attention. It's been a long time since she was in the spotlight and she was definitely going to take advantage of it. Finally, she approached Louis.

"I am so sorry I'm late. I am never like this. Usually I am on time, if not, early. Serena just had a fashion emergency and you know how she is…" Blair started babbling. Something she often did when she was unsure of herself.

"It's fine, Blair. It was definitely worth the wait. You look… Gorgeous." He kissed her cheek and wrapped his arm around hers. "I need you to meet my parents." He led her to the other side of the room.

_His parents? Like the Queen and King of Monaco? Already? _Blair's thoughts were definitely starting to get the best of her. She knew she was charming and intelligent. She always had adults eating out of the palm of her hand. This was different. This was royalty. All they do is try to find the best for their kids and Blair was definitely not the best compared to real prince and princesses. Next thing she knew she was standing in front of them.

"Ma… Pa… This is Blair Waldorf," Louis said proudly.

Blair put out her hand to shake the King's hand and regretted it the moment she did it. She's sure she is suppose to curtsey or something. Blair felt foolish.

He took her delicate hand and kissed it gently. "You are breathtaking, love."

"Thank you." Blair couldn't help but smile. She felt comfortable which was odd. She is sure this is some kind of test. There is no way he could be this nice. Blair turned towards his wife and began to curtsey. Mothers were always the worse. She had to make sure to show her the most respect.

"Don't be silly, darling! Come here. I won't bite." She hugged Blair tightly. Blair knew she was a delight, but didn't understand why they approved of her so quickly. "She is even more beautiful than you described, Louis I am so happy for you!"

"Son, I thought I'd die before you ever found someone you wanted to marry. You proved me wrong. I guess you won't have to go through the arranged marriage, after all."

_Marriage? What were they talking about? I never ever discussed such a thing. I am barely starting to get over Chuck and now there is talk about marriage?_ Blair just looked at Louis with a confused face.

"Pa, I haven't even asked her, yet. You ruined the surprise! Well… since the cat is out of the bag…" Louis went down on one knee. _This is going to be a long night_, she thought.

* * *

"This place is beautiful, Chuck…" Eva was in awe. She never saw such a fancy restaurant, let alone dine in one.

"It has nothing on you." Chuck squeezed her hand and smiled at her.

"I'm sorry, sir, but we're full tonight," said the hostess.

"I'm Chuck Bass. I'm sure there is an extra table." Chuck knew this infamous line would do the trick.

"Really now? Chuck Bass in Paris… At this time of year? I need to see your I.D."

"My I.D.? Are you saying you don't believe I'm Chuck Bass?" Chuck couldn't believe he was really being questioned.

"Chuck we can go somewhere else. It's okay…" Eva said motioning to the door.

"No, Eva. We are going to eat here." His eyes suddenly went dark. He was really starting to get annoyed.

"Chuck Bass would never wear that shirt or even those pants, for that matter." The hostess really didn't believe he was Chuck Bass and was ready to kick him out.

"Well, he obviously does, because I am Chuck Bass. Just get me a table…" His voice was low and he was trying not to make a scene. The last thing he wanted was for Eva to see his dark side. He couldn't believe he had to prove himself to a hostess.

"Then an I.D. shouldn't be a problem."

"I don't have it!"

"Well, then I'm sorry, we're full."

"Chuck… come one… it's okay." Eva was tugging his arm now.

"This is crazy!"

"Chuck… Can I talk to you?" Serena just appeared out of nowhere.

"Serena? Serena! Look she knows I'm Chuck Bass. Tell her, Serena. This bitch doesn't believe me."

"Is this true, miss? Is this _filthy_ man Chuck Bass?" she said disgusted.

"I know he use to be. Chuck, can we talk please?" Serena saw Eva staring at her. "Privately?"

"See? I'm Chuck Bass. Please go get me a table, now." Chuck said feeling he won.

"Chuck! We need to talk. Now!" Serena was becoming impatient. She didn't even recognized who he was anymore. Chuck would never waste his breath arguing with a hostess. She didn't know what has gotten into him.

"There is nothing to talk about, Serena." Chuck just wanted to eat with Eva. Why was that so hard?

"Chuck. She is your sister. Just talk to her. I'll wait." Eva really just wanted to leave. She knew tonight wouldn't be a good night.

"_Step_-sister! And I would never make you wait, Eva. Let's go eat."

"If you could wait ten minutes, I will find you something." Said the hostess, defeated.

"Thank you! You're the best!" He replied sarcastically.

"Chuck… Just five minutes. And it seems to me you have ten."

"What can be so important, Serena? Anything you want to say to me you can say in front of Eva."

"I don't think you want me to say this in front of her." Serena knew for a fact he'd get mad if she did.

"Yes you can. Hurry up. I don't have all night." Chuck wasn't even fully paying attention.

"Fine. I just wanted to say that I know you still love Blair. And I am happy you are finally letting her go, but you need to go back to New York. Just because you lost her doesn't mean you can just leave everything else behind. I know you said you lost the only thing you cared about, but we all care about you. The Empire needs you. Lily needs you. Nate needs you. Even I need you. I don't think you should keep up this front you have. You are letting Eva fall for somebody that doesn't exist. You need to man up and move on. Not run away."

"Serena… This is who I am now, and I love Eva. She has been here with me in my lowest part of my life. I am done with The Empire, Lily is fine without me, Nate can hang out with Humphrey and you have Blair. Please leave me alone and don't ever try to get contact with me again."

"You are making a big mistake… Please don't do this."

"Serena, I'm done. I am assuming you are here with the hundredth man this week. Go back to him or he will find another whore."

"I tried… Everything is on you now. Bye Chuck, or whoever you are." Serena went to the bathroom to touch up her make up. She couldn't believe Chuck would be this low. Blair is officially done with him and so is she. Serena went back to Pierre and asked to reschedule. She felt awful but she was in no mood tonight. She went back to her hotel.

* * *

The whole room fell silent again. Blair felt uneasy. Louis took her hand. "Blair, I know we just met, but you are the only girl who likes me for me. You are beautiful, smart, and love the same things I love." He then took a box out of his pocket and opened it to reveal a ring. "Blair, will you marry me?"

The ring was big and a princess cut. Typical. It was nothing like the ring she gave back to Chuck, though_. I can't marry him! I have New York, Columbia, Serena, Chuck… I can't just drop my life and marry a prince. A prince! Well… I did always want a prince charming. _She looked at his parents and they were smiling expecting a yes. So was the rest of the room. She didn't know what to say.

"I… I have school in the fall. I really like you, but my life is in New York." Blair didn't even know what she was getting at.

"We can make it work. We can go back and forth between New York and Paris," he looked really hopeful.

She looked up at the room again. Everyone was staring at her. She looked back at Louis. "Yes. Yes, I'll marry you!"

"She said yes!" his father yelled. The whole room cheered.

Blair felt horrible. She wasn't even ready for a serious relationship and now she's engaged. She needed food. She needed a lot of it.

**AN: I know this was short but it's longer than the last chapter. I know it seems a bit bizarre but trust me, I know where I'm going with this. PLEASE REVIEW!**


	3. Accidently, On Purpose

**AN: It has come to my attention that Serena and Blair stay at Eleanor's Penthouse. It gives me more freedom and ideas if Serena and Blair stay in the hotel. Hope you guys don't mind! And the long italicized part can be skipped if you want. It is Chuck's dream which consists of quotes that Blair has told Chuck over the years. If you are a fan of Chair from the TV show, then you already know them all. Next week I finish my winter session of school. So the next updates should be before Valentine's Day. Enjoy and review! :D**

**Thinking of You**

Accidently, On Purpose

_Chapter 3_

Blair rushed back to her hotel suite and ran to the kitchen. She grabbed the apple pie Serena made from her cooking class and started shoving it down her throat. _I don't know what to do. Why did I say, "Yes"? _A million thoughts were going through her mind about her evening with Louis. She felt really anxious and stressed about the situation she brought upon herself and went back to her old habits. She ate almost all of the pie and ran to the bathroom. She slowly lifted the toilet seat and knelt down in front of it. Tears were starting to stream down her cheek. _I will feel better. Come on. Throw up!_ She put her finger down her throat and started gagging. Finally she saw chunks of pie in the toilet and felt satisfied as she flushed it down. She wiped her mouth with the back of her hand, closed her eyes and laid against the wall. She took a deep breath and opened her eyes. Her body jumped at the sight of Serena in silk cream pajamas at the doorway.

"What are you doing here?" Blair felt ashamed that Serena caught her, but she wasn't ready to make a big deal of it. Before Serena could say anything she put the attention on her. "Didn't you have a date? I didn't expect to see you until your walk of shame tomorrow."

Serena slowly sat next to Blair and looked in her eyes. It hurt her to see her best friend fall back to her old habits. Serena put her arms around Blair and held her close. "B, what are you doing? You finally got better last year-"

"You think I don't know that?" Blair snapped. She didn't want to talk about the long way she had come. She felt horrible enough as it is already.

Serena felt bad, but she just wanted to know the reason behind Blair's actions. "Well, why are you ruining that? Is it because of Chu-"

"No, Serena! It isn't because of Chuck. You always think it's because of him. He isn't my only problem, okay? Every little thing I do isn't because of him. Do you really think I am that weak? I'm not," Blair blurted.

"I'm sorry, B. I just assumed… Well what else can make you this upset to hurt yourself? I don't understand…"

"Louis…" was all Blair managed to say.

"Louis? What did he do? Did he try anything? Blair, if he did you have to tell me. It isn't your fault. We can take him-"

"It's not like that, Serena…" Blair started laughing.

"Then what is it?" Serena was really confused. She couldn't understand what could go wrong with Louis. He seemed really sweet. It also didn't help to see Blair laugh hysterically. Suddenly Blair raised her left hand in front of Serena and for once in her life, Serena was left speechless.

"Look at me… I'm a mess. I'm going to wash up and get some sleep. We can talk about this in the morning."

Serena nodded and went back to bed.

* * *

"_Do you...like me?"_

"_Three words. Eight letters. Say it… and I'm yours." _

"_The worst thing you've ever done. The darkest thought you've ever had. I will stand by you through anything. Because I love you." _

"_Don't you understand? I'll always be here! I don't want you going anywhere. I couldn't bear it. So whatever you wanna do to yourself, please don't do that to me. Please." _

"_I believed in you. Your father believed in you. You...are the only one who didn't. All I wanted to do was...just, be there."_

"_I know you told Serena you love me. Last year you told Nate, this year you told Serena. You tell everyone but me, why can't you tell me?"_

"_You can't run, you have to stay here and here it this time. Chuck Bass, I love you. I love you so much it consumes me. I love you and I know you love me too. Tell me you love me and everything we've done, all the gossip and the lies and the hurt will have been for something. Tell me it was for something."_

"_I love you too."  
__"__But can you say it twice? No I'm serious, say it twice!"  
__"__I love you, I love you, that's three, four, I love you."_

"_I'm so sorry Chuck. I made a mistake. I know there's no excuse but, it's just a kiss. But not you. I don't feel that way about you. And I won't ever do it again. I promise. It was a mistake."_

"_I don't think you ran away because you couldn't handle death. I think it's because you couldn't handle feelings. You're not like that anymore. You're strong. You carry people. You carry me. You're becoming a man in a way that your father never was."_

"_That doesn't mean you're alone. I love you Chuck, and I'll always be your family."_

"_I never thought the worst thing you'd do would be to me." _

"_I've never thought it was possible to love someone too much, but maybe it is."_

"_I wasn't going to show up, I was resolve not to, every bone try to solve me, every voice in my head scream don't… But I didn't listen, I follow my heart because I love you, I can't deny that our path is been complicated, but in the end love makes everything simple…"_

"_Don't! Don't say her name! Or anything else to me ever again. This whole night didn't happen.__"_

"_I don't love you anymore. But it takes more than even you to destroy Blair Waldorf.__"_

"_Chuck…"_

"_CHUCK!"_

"CHUCK!"

"Blair, I love you!" Chuck opened his eyes and saw Eva.

Eva froze. She knew he dreamt of Blair, again. This time he couldn't deny it. She got up and went to the kitchen.

Chuck sat up and called after her. "Eva… It's not what you think…"

"Obviously you don't know what I'm thinking. Because I am thinking you still love Blair."

Chuck never admitted to himself that he did until just then. He didn't know what to tell her. He still has feelings for Blair, but he likes Eva. "Why did you even wake me up?"

"To tell you I made you breakfast. I didn't know that by doing so, you would confess your love for somebody other than the girl next to you in bed."

Chuck laid back down. He knew it would take a miracle to get him out of this one.

"Breakfast is on the table. Help yourself. I'm going out." Eva went to grab some money.

"Where are you going?" Chuck was scared she wouldn't come back.

"Out…"

"Out where?" Chuck sat back up.

"It's not like I'm your girlfriend. I don't have to tell you everywhere I'm going."

"Eva, you are my girlfriend. Please stop this…"

"Doesn't seem like you want me to be…"

"I do! Eva, stay here…"

"I'll be back in an hour or so. You can take care of yourself till then." Eva walked out the door and slammed it shut.

"SHIT!" Chuck didn't know what to do. He needed a drink.

He got up and limped to the kitchen and poured himself some scotch. He swirled it around for a bit before he gulped it all down. After that he changed into some jeans and a green button-up shirt. He went to the bathroom to brush his teeth and run his fingers through his hair, but he stood still staring in the mirror. He took a long look at his surroundings and at himself. _Who have I become? _He started to think about Blair. He missed her so much, but he lost her. He lost everything. He hit rock bottom. Even Eva hates him right now. He couldn't live like this anymore. Obviously another girl isn't the best distraction for him. He needed to get away. He needed to do something to get his mind off Blair.

He went outside and just leaned against the wall and watched people as they walked by. After a while he saw a guy in an Armani suit and a leather briefcase walk pass. He realized that use to be him. _Maybe it's not too late. Maybe I can go back to The Empire._ It probably went under since he wasn't there to run it, though. There was only one way to find out. He went to the closest café and asked if he could use their phone. He then found himself dialing Lily's number.

"Hello? Serena? What happened to your phone?"

"Lily, it's me."

"Charles?"

"Yeah…" Chuck couldn't believe he actually called.

"Oh, my god! Are you okay? Where are you? What happened?" She sounded upset, but relieved. Chuck smiled.

"Lily, I'm fine. Listen… Who is in charge of The Empire right now?"

"I haven't heard from you in months and you are asking me about The Empire?" Now she just sounded mad.

"I know… I'm sorry. I should have called sooner, but can you tell me? I need to know."

"I am Charles. Who else would be?" She answered as if he should know this. He was happy to know she was.

"Lily, I am taking the first plane back. Can you sign it back over to me? I've got to get my life back as soon as I can… Lily, do this for me!"

"Yes, Charles, of course. I am just glad to know you are alright. Have you talked to Serena? Does she know you are okay?" He was surprised at how easy that was.

"Yeah she knows…"

"She didn't tell me you two have spoke…" That explains why she is okay with this.

"It was last night. Well, thank you Lily. Can you have my car pick me up after my flight? Tell him Chuck Bass is back."

* * *

Serena woke up and looked at the clock. It was 2 in the afternoon. She got up and ran to Blair's room.

"Blair! Blair, wake up!"

"Huh? What Serena? I'm in a good sleep…"

"I'm sure you are. It's 2 o' clock."

Blair giggled and opened her eyes to look at Serena. "No it isn't. Nice try though."

"B, I'm serious!" Serena showed her the clock and Blair's face immediately fell.

"Oh, my god! Serena we're late!" Blair leaped off the bed and into the restroom.

"That was what I was trying to tell you, B." Serena murmured.

"Why didn't the hotel give us our wakeup call? You did tell them when we checked in the other day to give us our wakeup call, right?" Blair asked as she put her hair back as she was about to brush her teeth.

"Oh… I thought you did…" Serena fucked up, once again, and was ready for whatever lecture Blair was about to throw her way. She was surprised that Blair just rolled her eyes in annoyance instead.

"Can you handle calling Louis, then, and tell him we are going to running late?" Blair responded with the tooth brush in her mouth. She didn't have time to argue with Serena. Thankfully Serena understood her and nodded as she got up to grab her phone.

Blair couldn't believe she almost missed her lunch with Louis and Pierre. They were supposed to meet at some café Pierre was crazy about. She liked how Louis was such good friends with his driver. It made her smile. Blair grabbed a fresh hand towel to wipe her mouth and dry her hands. She then pulled out her hair band and ran her fingers through her hair. Suddenly her hand got stuck and the she remembered the ring. She untangled her hair and then stared at her hand. She could have sworn that her engagement was just a dream.

Blair began to freak out and went back to her room. "Serena… SERENA!"

Serena rushed back to the room. "What, B? What happened? Are you okay?"

Blair put her hand out as she said each word carefully. "What is on my finger?"

"An engagement ring… Oh, my God, Blair! You forgot to tell me how that happened… Spill!" Serena's eyes got big with excitement.

"You can see it, too? I thought it was just a dream…" Blair sat down on the bed shocked.

"No… it wasn't. What happened, B?" Serena sat down next to her.

"Did you call Louis?"

"Yeah, he said they will be there at three and wait for us. Now stop changing the subject. What happened?"

"It all happened so fast. I got there and it was like I was Cinderella. Everyone stared at me and talked about how gorgeous I was. Then all of a sudden Louis was on his knee."

"Wow… Maybe you should have gotten a less appealing dress…" Serena joked.

"This isn't funny! He proposed in front of everybody so I couldn't say no."

"What are you going to do?" Serena was finally being serious.

"I don't know… I obviously can't marry him Serena. That is crazy! I have Columbia in the fall… Not to mention this is way too soon!"

"Some Summer fling, huh?" Serena didn't know what else to say.

"What should I do?"

"You should just tell him you got caught up in the heat of the moment. Tell him all your plans and that you aren't ready for such a commitment. He'll understand," Serena responded as she patted her back.

"That's it? That's all I have to say?"

"Well, yeah. It's the truth."

"Okay. I will tell him when we get there."

"Good. Now get ready! We have forty-five minutes!" Serena started freaking out and went to the closet trying to figure out what to wear. Blair just grabbed the dress she already picked out for the occasion and laughed at Serena. She really wished Serena would follow her example and get more organized. But what can she do? Serena is Serena.

* * *

Chuck started walking back to Eva's wondering if he did the right thing. He wasn't sure if he was ready for New York just yet. Suddenly he saw Blair and Serena get out of the cab in front of him. He couldn't help but stare, once again. She was wearing a strapless purple dress with a pink print on it that fell just above her knees. She also had pink heels and a pink headband. Only Blair can pull off such a ridiculous outfit. She was laughing at something Serena said and then she saw him.

"Chuck…" Blair's smile went away.

"Blair…" Chuck grinned.

"What are you doing here?" was all Blair managed to say.

"B, we got to get a move on. Louis and Pierre are waiting." Serena glared at Chuck.

"I'll take care of this, Serena. You can go on ahead. I'll be there in a minute," Blair replied simply.

"Alright…" Serena squeezed Blair's arm and started walking towards the café.

"You look beautiful," breathed Chuck.

"Save it, Chuck. What are you still doing in Paris?"

"I am actually on my way to get my things so I can get back to New York. Do you care to join me?"

Blair had no idea what Chuck meant by that. She gave him her signature eye roll and started heading to the café.

Chuck grabbed her hand. "Blair, wait…"

Blair turned around and as soon as she was about to pull her hand away, she saw that Chuck noticed the ring.

"What's this?" Chuck's cool exterior started to heat up as he dropped her delicate hand.

"An engagement ring, obviously. I told you that I didn't love you anymore. Why are you still trying Chuck? I have clearly moved on. You should follow my example." Blair tried to stay strong and not let Chuck know that she still loved him. It hurt her to see him like this, but she needed to stay as far away from him as she could.

"By marrying the first person I see?" Chuck couldn't believe she went off and got engaged. That was the last thing he expected from her.

"Don't be silly. I just think I deserve to be happy. I deserve my fairytale ending that you tried to tell me didn't exist. I now know that you were wrong. I met Louis. _Prince _Louis. And he made me happy and feel like royalty. Well I should feel royal now that I am going to be a princess." Blair was best at putting up a front. This wasn't her first time. She could never let Chuck see her unhappy or broken. That just means he would win.

"Well, I hope he makes you happy Blair. I clearly haven't and you deserve better." Chuck was broken, once again. He could never catch a break.

"Thank you for your blessing, Bass. Not that I need it." Blair replied with a sarcastic smile.

"Blair! Are you coming?" Serena yelled from the café's entrance.

"I'm coming!" Blair yelled back. "Bye, Chuck. Have a safe flight." She turned and walked away.

Chuck just started to limp back to Eva's. He now knew for certain he was ready to go back.


End file.
